Come closer, dear friends, as I tell you the story of how I came to love Buffy: Slayer of the Vampyrs (and the subsequent social-life altering obsession that followed).
To my memory, my first "experience" with Buffy went a little something like this:
We are in a middle school in suburban Boulder, Colorado. ANGLE Two girls, approx. 13 years old, sit at desks in an advanced language arts classroom. They're clothed in the latest trends: tube socks with slip-on sandals, super-short jorts, and tight shirts that read "Abercrombie & Fitch." Both, unfortunately, have braces. Neither has learned to manage their hair appropriately. Enter Ms. B, eighth grade teacher, who overhears the following conversation.
Girl 1: OMG did you watch Friends last night?
Girl 2: Is that a sick joke? Um...duh!
Girl 1: It was like...I'm still shocked that Rachel and Ross got back together and now, you know-
Girl 2: HE HAS A TAPE OF IT! I KNOW. omgomgomgomgomg.
Girl 1: Ms. B, do you watch Friends?
Ms. B: No, I do not.
Girl 2: Why? You're missing out!
Ms. B: I think it's a little shallow...
Girl 1/Girl 2: (gasp)
Girl 1: So what do you watch then? What's your favorite show?
Ms. B: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Girl 2: (stunned silence)
Girl 1: You have GOT to be kidding.
CUT TO: a month later--I'm at my grandparents house in Salt Lake City, bored out of my mind, and I discover that there's a Thanksgiving Day Buffy marathon. I think about how ridiculous a show must be to have such a shameful name, and then I flip the channel to FX and kick back. After all, the alternative was playing another infuriating card game upstairs around the kitchen table.
And then it happened. The first episode I saw was Becoming Part 2. I cried. And then I cried some more. And then I heard "Full of Grace" by Sarah Mclachlan and I at once knew that I loved this show and that I wanted to have her babies.
And thus, an obsession was born. I watched all 10 hours of available eps that day, and the rest is history.
At times, I had a handle on my addiction--watching only when others weren't around to taunt or berate me. Pretending I was a member of the Scooby gang and solving difficult moral quandaries in my mind while imagining that I was Willow or Anya. Normal stuff. But then, I ordered not one but TWO ginormous Buffy posters for my bedroom, and refused to answer friends' calls on Tuesday nights between 7-8 pm. I may have received a 'condolences' card in the mail from someone who knew the depth of my mourning the night 'Chosen' aired. This is just the tip of the iceberg, but I'd rather not further incriminate myself.
There you have it friends--the reason I find it not only acceptable but also the most awesome thing ever to be contributing to a Buffy blog.
In short, BtVS is my one great and true love (not pathetic). Buffy and Willow and Xander are my friends. Glory and Adam and the Master and the Mayor and the First are my enemies. And Giles is my lover.
(What? Fine.)
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