Play by Play: The Initiative

Oh ok, Forest, you can go fly a kite with your mini-diatribe against the modern woman. I'm glad you become a mindless automaton robot psycho, you perv.

Buffy IS "peculiar,"as a character and a show, but I need not tell you that. It's the number one reason that I feel comfortable walking the line between socially acceptable and abnormally introverted slash attracted to showtunes and various cheese products.  I give credit to BtVS for teaching me that it is OK to be different--and that it is even preferable ("a valid lifestyle choice," if you will.  It's OK to be a vamp slayer, a lez, an unemployed townie, a post-apocalyptic soul-searching librarian.)   Our generation's Glee. (Love you, Glee.)

I like jelly donuts too, Xander.  I'm sorry you feel useless, but if I were a slayer, I can assure you, I'd want--nay, need--a lot of mother#($*%&! donuts.  You fulfill an important role...you bring the sweets.  And the sweet.  (Unless, of course, you're playing saboteur. Forgiveness is a bitter pill for me to swallow.)

Spike's cell in the initiative is oddly reminiscent of the dentist's office.  Or at least what I remember of the dentist's office.  I need to make a dentist appointment.

Ballpoints CAN be tricky, Willow, just like your feelings.  "It's not my job to coddle my students."  To the contrary, Maggie, I've found that's just EXACTLY an educator's job. (Wah, wah.)

Giles, you can say "rasburrrry" all you want.  (Come to mama...what?  Sorry.)

Riley is admirable, certainly.  Parker deserved to be punched into the next century.  But here's where I struggle with Riley...he's perfect.  Loving, adorable, protective, macho but sort of sensitive, and of the nicely-built slice o' middle American pie  But let's get real ladies, none of us would go for this in RL.  We know I wouldn't--maybe I'm just projecting my issues (why am I allowed to blog?).  Who needs passion? romance? excitement? longing? when you've got available, stable, and flowy bangs?  Srsly, for $14.99, Great Clips could fix that shit real quick.

Digging the sapphic mopey music, Wil.  Aaaaaand cue the lady lovin'.

GO AWAY HARMONY.  Spike is so dull when he's with her; this relationship is only interesting when juxtaposed with his love for our dear slayer.  But vampiric impotence-that's something special.  I love how Spike is continuously brought crashing down to earth, no matter how hard he seems.  For a vampire, he is one of the most human characters in an incredibly well-developed cast of multi-layered misfits.

I don't really care about the combat.  My heart breaks for Willow: "I've seen honest faces before.  They usually come attached to liars."  Word.

Play by Play: Something Blue

There is almost nothing as sad as the departure of Oz.

First, I know this is a controversial statement, but I am a big fan of Riley, both as a character and as a plot device. Seeing Buffy interact with an upstanding, good-hearted, corn-fed Iowa (undead) boy was necessary to realistically move Buffy as a character—not to mention the show itself—from the melodramatic, Angel-obsessed high school days (but Oh! How we loved those days!) to the possibility of real development in college.

Because Buffy can’t help but suffer every single day of her life, it’s refreshing when she gets a little break from all the drama. However, Riley has a tough act to follow (and precede!). Since Buffy’s life is pain, her love must be pain as well. No regular guy could possibly satisfy a super-human in the long run. But Riley gives it the ol’ college try. And, he juxtaposes nicely with the other men in Buffy’s life.

Speaking of, season 4 Spike is priceless. But who am I kidding? He’s always priceless. But Spike is especially brilliant when he’s chained up, neutered, and “drinking pig’s blood from a novelty mug,” as he says. (The mug says Kiss the Librarian. Don’t tempt me, Giles.) Because we’re seeing more of Spike, we’re also receiving one of the benefits of his company: a much-needed ability to read people.

Oh puhleeeeze, Riley. Nobody DRIVES for fun. Get a real hobby.

Ah, drunk Willow at the Bronze. She’s in some real pain, which typically leads to spells with outrageous results. I like her speech to Giles (before she makes him blind) about grief. It’s so true that people are willing to deal with another’s sadness only for so long. But grief isn’t on a timetable. And whatever pain a person is going through seems like the worst pain in the world.

I remember the first time I saw this episode. Watching Spike and Buffy as a head-over-heels-in-love couple made me the happiest girl in the world. Other great moments include: Giles’ momentary show of emotion over Buffy’s request to walk her down the aisle. Riley’s befuddlement over Buffy’s wedding dress hysteria and attraction to much older men. Xander’s lips as the Fruit Roll Ups of love.

Every episode has its hilarious moments, even alongside the tragedies that inevitably lurk behind every corner. Here, the tragedy is that Spike and Buffy broke off their engagement.

D'hoffryn: “Here is my talisman, you change your mind, give us a chat.”